Arrived in Jamiaca yesterday - the sun is shining and London seems a world away. Time for me to de-clutter my head and get a tan.

I've been a huge fan of Radio 4 for many years now and rarely miss an episode of The Archers. I even post messages on The Archers Message Boards, which shows real dedication.

A programme that will appeal to anyone interested in coaching or personal development is All in the Mind. It goes out at 9pm on Tuesday and 4.30pm on Wednesday and episodes are available on the BBC iplayer. Two recent programmes of particular interest include one which asks whether we can be taught how to be happy (or happier) and another one about Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT). Regarding CBT - I'd recommend it to anyone, which is why I found this programme so interesting.

The programme about teaching people how to be happy passed on a tool that I use with some of my clients and it works as follows. Before going to sleep at night write down three things that have gone well. It doesn't matter what the three things are. Could be a pleasant conversation with your neighbour, a walk in the park or a successful business transaction. Get into the habit of doing this. Your happiness levels will increase. Try it. It works.

Can't quite believe that I'm posting a SECOND entry about the X Factor, but there you go.

I felt a bit ashamed after watching it last night. John and Edward Grimes were voted off - and I was delighted. More than that, I felt a surge of adrenalin through my body while Danni Minogue was making her mind up and then a wave of elation when she said she was sending them home. It was when I saw their crestfallen faces that I felt ashamed.

On a scale of one to ten, the shame that I felt was probably only about two but it's been interesting to ask myself where it came from. Am I a wicked person? Do I really care (really?) who wins the X Factor? Do I need to get out more on a Saturday night?

I've not come up with a definitive answer yet but will be looking out for my reactions next time I'm watching. For the record, think Stacey should win.

Last night I went out for dinner with friends to an Argentinian steak house. Excellent food and good company though thanks to an open flame grill, the restaurant was too hot. Afterwards we walked down the road to a bar/restaurant called Village East on Bermondsey Street. It's a stylish place and there's always a good atmosphere with a fun mix of people. Last night we bumped into some friends there which made it extra special and we didn't leave until after 2am.

I often tell visitors to London that the city is simply lots of small villages stuck together. That means villages with local shops, restaurants and bars. Feeling a sense of community, for me, is a very positive thing and I realised last night that this can be enhanced by using local services and leisure facilities just a little bit more. It also saves a small fortune on taxis.

Watch out for more entries from me about the Bermondsey/Borough/Elephant area.

I'm feeling delicate this morning, following a spectacular birthday party last night for my friend Niko's birthday. It was a masked ball - you weren't allowed in without a mask and everyone kept them on for the first couple of hours. The effort that everyone made with their costumes was one of the things that made it an amazing party. There was an impressive array of Viennese (or should that be Venetian) masks, cowboys, bank robbers and at least a dozen eighteenth century dandies, complete with powdered wigs and knicker bockers. Conversely, there was a couple wearing Jedward masks - clearly there's no escaping those two at the moment.

I was wearing eye make up and an OTT feathery Phantom mask. Imagine my surprise when I was approached about some life coaching. Although I often get new clients in social situations, it didn't occur to be that I'd be having an in depth conversation about NLP from behind a mask. Something must have been shining through - we start working together on Tuesday - not a mask in sight!

Gordon Brown is in trouble, in a most unexpected way. He sent a hand-written letter of condolence to the mother of Jamie Janes of the 1st Battalion Grenadier Guards, who died in action on 5th October. Clearly this was meant as a kind and thoughtful gesture, possibly motivated by the fact that Mr Brown knows what it is to lose a child.

The unfortunate thing is that the letter appeared to spell Jamie's name incorrectly, was badly written and contained spelling mistakes. Mrs Janes, who must be in agony at the loss of the son, has taken offence at this. Every newspaper in the land is now reporting the story and a telephone conversation between the PM and Mrs Janes can be listened to online.

This is perhaps a battle that Mr Brown was never going to win. A printed letter could easily have been judged disrespectful. Sending no letter at all would have been worse. So, Mr Brown, with his rubbish eyesight, appalling handwriting and over-full schedule chose to send a handwritten note to Jamie's mother. In this particular case, he got it wrong. That said, other families who have lost a son will have drawn great comfort from a handwritten letter from the PM, regardless of spelling and handwriting.

The press need to give Gordon Brown and Jacqui Janes a break on this one. Brown was obviously trying to do the right thing. Mrs Janes is beside herself with grief. No one is going to benefit from keeping this story in the headlines, least of all Jacqui Janes and her family.

I went to a birthday party on Saturday night at Anne's house in Chiswick. It was her mother Betty's birthday and a comfortable mix of family and friends were invited. There was a couple there who I decided a couple of years ago that I don't like much. It's never been a big deal and Anne knew about it - really it was just a case of getting off on the wrong foot and me choosing to take against them.

During a text exchange last week with Anne the subject came up and she sent me the following message:-

'Coach yrself on 2nd chances 4 people!'

This was a throw-away comment from Anne, who has no interest in coaching or the field of personal development. However, it did make me think. I have an excellent reputation as a coach but have formed a negative opinion about a couple and I have not considered reviewing this opinion. Is that an evolved way to carry on? Does it demonstrate emotional intelligence? Are there other people who deserve a second chance from me?

It took minimal effort from me to be nice and make things right between us. It also made the party more enjoyable. I'm going to try this second chance lark again soon. Give it a go - it's a good thing!

Last night turned out to be very memorable. I met up with my friend Mark Watty at Momo, just off Regent Street. Momo is a Morrocan restaurant with a very atmospheric tea room attached to it. It was lovely - all squishy cushions and flickery lanterns and a great place to catch up. We had tickets for the Michael Fienstein show - a one night only performance at the Palladium. I was still suffering slightly from the effects of the Halloween party when the curtain went up. Fienstein is a great entertainer but I have to confess to wondering if I was going to enjoy two and a half hours of him.

Anyway, he sang a few numbers and then after twenty minutes or so, his guest John Barrowman took to the stage. Barrowman was sensational. There's no other word for it. He looked great, sounded amazing and his energy was infectious - he's a very funny guy anyway and this came across effortlessly. At the interval, Mark and I made a beeline for the bar and bumped into Barrowman's partner Scott (I know Scott socially) who told us that that John had finished and they were about to leave for Wales or somewhere. How disappointing! - we were hoping for a couple more numbers at least. We ordered a couple of those cute little bottles of champagne (very thirsty) and the feeling was, how brave/generous/whatever of Fienstein to have Barrowman on as a guest - talk about having someone steal your thunder!

Fienstein clearly had a game plan though. He came back after the interval and absolutely set the place alight - obviously he'd been pacing himself and he saved the best of his performance until the second half. If he, in any way, felt that he was taking a gamble by sharing the limelight with Barrowman, the gamble paid off big time. It was a fabulous show and you left the theatre feeling that Fienstein, apart from being an amazing performer, is probably a very nice guy who's comfortable in his own skin.

I received a text a couple of weeks ago inviting me to a Halloween Party in West Norwood. The invitation came from a friend from many years ago called Tony. He'd also invited me last year and I was unable to go so I decided to make a particular effort to go this year. The thing is, I arrived without having any expectations or preconceived ideas about how the party would turn out. I've been very busy for one thing and also because I didn't know anyone else who was going, didn't have anyone to discuss it with.

It was a really good party. Had a great time and met some lovely people, most of whom were in costume (I'll wear one next year, if I'm invited back). I'm pretty sure that my lack of expectation before the party made it an even better experience. There's a saying - 'expectations reduce joy'. Although it would be a funny old world if none of us had any expectations, it's probably true that if we managed our expectations better, we might up the levels of joy we experience in the world.

I'm going to get a beer from the fridge now - no expectations what ever.